Men's Mental Health and Friendship: Strength, Kindness and Courage

In an episode of Healthy Mind Healthy Life, host Avik Chakraborty speaks with Andy Jackson, a Scottish-born entrepreneur, author of BroHeart and founder of ALWELLCO, about men's mental health and friendship. Jackson challenges the quiet crisis many men face: surrounded by people yet feeling unseen, and reframes masculinity to include both strength and emotional courage. The conversation matters because loneliness among men is rising, and this episode offers a practical path forward grounded in kindness, vulnerability and two or three honest friendships.

Key takeaways

• Ask what kind of men we want boys to become, not what is wrong with them.
• Strength without heart becomes ego; heart without strength cannot protect anyone.
• Build real friendship, not just a network. Find two or three people you could call at 2 a.m.
• When struggling, tell one trusted friend. When listening, offer empathy, not fixes.
• Protect time for laughter and mates; banter is often how men connect.
• Reclaim words like bro to mean brotherhood over ego.

Why do so many men say I'm fine when they are not?

Men often hide their hearts because traditional masculinity taught them that strength meant silence. Jackson explains that for generations, boys learned to suppress emotion, wear a mask and say I'm fine even when struggling. This habit does not make men stronger. It isolates them, keeps pain locked inside and prevents the connections that actually sustain wellbeing.

The episode opens with the recognition that many men are surrounded by people yet feel unseen. When hiding becomes the default, asking for help feels impossible. Jackson suggests that the problem is not weakness or failure. The problem is a narrow story about what it means to be a man, one that leaves no room for the full range of human emotion.

Photo: ANTONI SHKRABA production, Pexels

What does a bigger masculinity look like?

Jackson offers a reframe: strength and kindness are not opposites. They are teammates. A bigger masculinity holds both. Strength without heart becomes ego, dominance or aggression. Heart without strength cannot protect, guide or stand firm when needed. Together, they create men who are grounded, capable and present.

The episode draws on four pillars Jackson describes in his work: strength, loyalty, laughter and kindness. These qualities are not soft or secondary. They are the foundation of resilience, connection and a life that feels whole. Masculinity is not something men need to escape or reject. It is something to expand, to include vulnerability as courage and empathy as action.

Jackson also reclaims the word bro, often associated with shallow culture or toxic behavior. He redefines it as brotherhood, a bond built on trust, honesty and showing up when it matters. This shift in language matters because it invites men to see friendship not as networking or status but as a lifeline.

How do you build real friendship as a man?

Real friendship is not about the number of contacts in your phone or how many people you see at events. Jackson draws a clear line between networking and friendship. Networking is transactional. Friendship is relational. The question is not how many people know your name. It is how many people you could call at 2 a.m. when life falls apart.

The episode suggests aiming for two or three people you trust deeply. These are the friends who hear you, who do not rush to fix or judge, who sit with you in the hard moments. Many men struggle to build these friendships because they were never taught how. Culture encourages competition, performance and surface-level banter, all of which can create connection but rarely create intimacy.

Jackson encourages men to protect time for laughter and mates. Humor and banter are not shallow. They are often how men signal care, test trust and relieve tension. But beneath the jokes, there needs to be permission to say when something is not okay. The friends who matter are the ones who can hold both the laughter and the weight.

Photo: Christina & Peter, Pexels

What do you do when you are struggling?

When struggling, tell one trusted person. That is the practical, immediate step Jackson returns to. Not everyone. Not social media. One friend who will listen without trying to solve, rescue or minimize.

The episode frames this as an act of courage, not weakness. Vulnerability is not about oversharing or constant emotional display. It is about naming what is true when it matters. For many men, that first conversation is the hardest. Once they experience being heard without judgment, the isolation begins to lift.

For the friend on the receiving end, Jackson emphasizes empathy over fixes. Men often default to problem solving because it feels active and useful. But what someone in pain needs first is to be seen and believed. Advice can come later, if asked for. Presence comes first.

The episode also asks a bigger question: what kind of men do we want boys to become? This shifts the conversation from fixing what is wrong with men to imagining what is possible. It invites fathers, mentors, educators and friends to model a masculinity that includes emotional honesty, mutual support and the strength to admit when help is needed.

Who this episode is for

This episode is for men who feel isolated despite being surrounded by people, and for anyone raising, teaching or caring about boys and men. It is also for those who want to understand how masculinity can expand to include vulnerability, kindness and honest connection without losing strength.

Listen to the full episode

Hear the complete conversation with Andy Jackson on Healthy Mind Healthy Life. Explore more episodes on mental wellness, resilience and human connection at the show page.